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The beginning of the end

May 28th, 2010 No comments

I have wondered recently whether there is any point in keeping this blog alive. I haven’t written anything now for a number of months, despite having a lot more free time than usual. In the end though, I’ve been surprised at the number of people reading this and, at least for a little while, this has sparked me into writing again.

As I write this I’m finishing the first week of my last block of my penultimate year at University. I can’t help but think this really is the start of the end of this part of my life. I’m no fan of change and I’m not looking forward to the loss of my current comforts in just over a year’s time. All the same, I really am fed up of being a student and really can’t wait to start a proper job.

Before that emotional rollarcoaster starts, I have the warm-up ride of this summer to get through. I can’t recall any time over the past few years where I’ll be spending months without some of the close friends I’m used to being around. Over the next few days and weeks I’m going to have to say goodbye to too many people who I don’t want to go. At least one I’ll probably never see again. I don’t like change.

I have a week abroad to look forward to – this first time in over 4 years(!!) – but before then I still have 4 more weeks of 4th year to get through. Thankfully I’ve moved back home for this month, I’m almost feeling appreciative of my family’s company.

Perhaps what worries meĀ  most is the knowledge that as I clear the summer and normality resumes – which it will, I don’t doubt – the threat of my finals will loom all the more. Revising for them is not something I really want to think about. 255 days to go, don’t you know.

In the end I don’t particularly want to retire this blog, it is a source of some amusement looking back on it. I feel, however, as I head towards the bigger world of work, I can’t really keep this going forever. It is my aim then to keep on until that point, hopefully releasing some of the stress here. If you know me in the flesh, know it is incredibly embarrassing when someone mentions this blog. That is a self-confidence issue I haven’t yet resolved.

Let the end begin.

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